It Was Always You
by emmieeann
Summary: Oneshot.Edward leaves in New Moon but not really. He is always watching Bella. He watches her live the life she knew he wanted for her. Will he get his final goodbye before she leaves the world forever? Its just a short sad little thing. R&R my 1st onesho


It took one short glance and I knew. I knew that I loved her. I knew she needed to be mine, just as I needed to be hers. However, I also knew it could not happen. I could-- would not damn her to an eternal life in the shadows. I stuck around for a couple years. Hoping that maybe I could change my mind. Hoping that it would appear as a good idea. Sadly, that day never came, just as I thought. I realized after those very short glorious two years, that day never would come and it all needed to end now. When I walked away all those years ago, she didn't have an idea in the slightest of the truth. I never left, I never could. She was my only love, it was impossible. I ran as fast as I could then rounded back, watching her from the trees in the matter of seconds. She was just standing there…staring. What have I done?! I thought to myself. After a while, she finally walked back to her house. Sobbing before bed each night for months and cringing at many things that associated with my family or I. Many times, I considered coming in and showing her I never left. That was, however, until I remembered why it was necessary that I was not involved in her life.

Six months later, I didn't think I could stand it anymore. I considered suicide, the Volturi, coming back to my love, or just leaving all together. But then she met him one day. She took a quick trip to the grocery store for milk. When she came outside it was pouring heavily, and she had no umbrella. She jogged to her truck only to find that one of her tires were flat. A man offered help to her. When she looked at him, I saw the life I had stolen from her return. They began seeing each other, going out, and by the end of college, planning their wedding. When he proposed and she excitedly said yes, I almost lost it. Hatred to the man, self-hate, and agony were fighting for emotional control over my body. In the end, agony was the victor. I continued watching my Bella go on with her life.

On her wedding day, as she walked down the aisle, I pretended she was my lady in white, meeting me at the altar. My dream was shattered the second she touched the outstretched hand that was not mine. I watched and watched, when I knew I should turn away, when it hurt too much. I would see her sleeping happily next to her husband at night, snuggling closer. I was always wishing it was me she was with. I always dreamt it was, but of course, it was not. I knew I had my reasons but I always wished I did not.

I watched as her new bundle of joy was placed into her arms. I watched the happy family in agony. I watched as the child grew. The child was like a mirrored image of my love. I watched every tear that dripped out of Bella's eyes. I heard every noise that came out of her mouth. I watched every breath she took. Always waiting, watching, listening. But never experiencing. I witnessed her worst night possibly of all since I began to watch. Her and her beautiful child were playing games, waiting for my replacement to come home. The police came to the door, delivering the terrible news of Bella's husbands death. I watched in the worst pain imaginable as she and her daughter sobbed held each other tightly. Bella could not deal with anymore pain from love, she never dated again. Her daughter grew up happily and healthy with her perfect mother. I again, many times, considered rushing back into her life to show her how much I loved her and that I never left. But it was not the right thing to do and I would not ruin her even worse than I did the first time.

I watch as her daughter and husband leave for the final time. I watch my beautiful ninety-two year old Bella sleeping peacefully in her bed, counting down her final minutes. I decide for the first time in seventy-four years, the right thing to do, is show her I am here. I silently step through the cracked open window and walk to her bed. She is still just as beautiful as ever. I very gently place my hand on her cheek. She smiled a small smile then opened her eyes. "I figured you would come in soon enough." she said, taking hold of my hand. "You always knew didn't you?" I said stroking her cheek with my other hand, leaning in closer. "I did. Edward?" she replied putting my hand in between both of hers and laying them across her chest over her heart. "Yes, love?" I replied watching her closely. It won't be much longer now…

"I did it for you." she said. I wasn't sure what she was saying so she continued. "You wanted me to live a normal, happy life. I knew all those years ago you were there. I figured it out. I loved my husband of course, but it was always you that I wanted and needed. I always loved you but I didn't let you know because I knew what you wanted for me. But I always loved you." she said staring into my eyes. "Just as I always loved you. I'm proud of you, love." I replied still stroking her cheek. "My time is almost up just like it was all those years ago. But you meddled with fate." she paused smiling still remembering when we discussed that seventy-five years ago. "I love you, Edward. I always have, and I will for eternity." she finished her eyes beginning to slowly close. "I love you too, my Bella. From the first moment I saw you until forever, never ending love." I replied bending down to kiss her forehead. And then, I felt her hands go limp around mine and heard her heart stutter, then stop. I took my hand out of hers and slowly left her room. "Don't worry, love. I'll join you very soon, then we will be together forever in heaven like I promised seventy-four years ago." I whispered.

A/N-I hope you liked it!! You may have noticed sometimes they would say 75 yrs ago or 74, I based that by when Bella was 17 and 18. Because, when he left, it was right after her birthday so it was when she was 18. Please review and tell me what you thought!


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